Why Losing To The Patriots Is The Worst

Patriots running back Jonas Gray celebrates by spiking the ball in the Colts end zone during Sunday Night Football. (Photo: Matt Kryger/Indy Star)

Patriots running back Jonas Gray celebrates by spiking the ball in the end zone during Sunday Night Football. (Photo: Matt Kryger/Indy Star)

So, the Colts lost to the Patriots. Again. You’d think we’d be used to it by now. But, we’re not. Because nothing is worse than losing to the New England Patriots. And when you lose to the Patriots, nothing is ok.

Here’s what happens when you lose to the Patriots:

You picture Patriots quarterback Tom Brady in the locker room at Lucas Oil Stadium doing that “trying to act macho” yell (which comes out more like a scream), high-fiving (and missing) his teammates, then getting a pedicure before strapping on his Uggs and strutting out to the team bus carrying Coach Belichick’s Yorkie. Not ok.

You picture Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski in all his douchebaggery, wearing only a towel, a beer bong, and that goofy grin, making fart noises with his hand in his armpit saying, “You want to hear how bad the Colts stunk?” Not ok.

You picture Patriots running back Jonas Gray stopping to sign autographs on the way out of the stadium. Which isn’t all that offensive…until you realize no one knew who he was before he played the Colts. Not ok.

You picture Patriots cornerback Darrelle Revis handing Colts General Manager Ryan Grigson a bill for the time Reggie Wayne spent on Revis Island. Not ok.

You picture Patriots head coach Bill Belichick taking off his hoodie, hanging it in an empty locker in the visitor locker room, and attaching a note to it that reads:

Dear Chuck,

Looks like it’s time to roll up your sleeves. Or, better yet…cut them off!

Love, Bill

And sporting an evil grin as he turns out the lights at Lucas Oil Stadium after securing his first win there. Not ok.

Like I said…

Losing to the Patriots is the worst.

Go Colts!

One comment

  1. Linda Campbell says:

    Always love your humor Heather. Absolutely true, I Hate losing to those guys! You did make me laugh though, so thanks.

    Your Blue Ladied Fan, Linda

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