Dan Shaughnessy: “Colts Won’t be a Challenge for the Patriots.” The Blue Mare Responds.

Dear Mr. Shaughnessy,

Let me start by thanking you. You see, I’ve been snowed in in Indianapolis, in sub-freezing temperatures…for going on three days now. As you can imagine, cabin fever has set in and I was wondering what I could do today to keep from losing my mind. As it turns out, responding to an arrogant, regioncentric, New England football fan is just what the doctor ordered.

Your column in the Boston Globe about the Colts-Patriots playoff game, the one where you refer to the Colts as a “playoff chump…a dome team with a young quarterback, a neophyte coach, and a bad defense.” You know the one. This is why no one likes you. Or your team.

There are a few things I can’t argue with. Lucas Oil Stadium has a roof. And we tend to use it when it’s cold outside. In fact, if memory serves me right, you once lost a Super Bowl under that roof. In February. Wonder what would have happened if we opened it. Guess we’ll never know…

Yes, Andrew Luck is a sophomore quarterback. But on the field, he is no more a neophyte than your Ugg-wearing quarterback is manly. And just a little warning, Tom Brady will probably be terrified of Andrew Luck’s beard. I certainly am.

As for our coach, Chuck Pagano, you can call him whatever you like. Compare him to average football coaches who Bill Belichick has “swallowed up” over the years. This is a guy who has done more with less this year than any other coach in the league. And a man who stared death in the face last year isn’t going to be scared off by The Grinch. In fact, Coach Pagano has the one thing that scares him the most…a huge heart.

I’m glad you remember your old friend, Adam Vinatieri. We like to call him “Money.” Lucky for us, your team chose not to give him any.

So, to summarize, there are two types of football fans: Patriots fans. And everyone else. And everyone else is united in their dislike of the Patriots.

This is mostly due to outward displays of arrogance. And the fact that you illegally taped opponents…while accusing the Colts of pumping fake noise into the RCA Dome.

Also, having one of your star players go to jail (FOR MURDER) has done nothing for your likability.

This may surprise you, but I personally have great respect for the Patriots. Especially your poorly-dressed coach and your metrosexual quarterback.

The Colts-Patriots rivalry has brought me some of my best football memories over the years. And I look forward to adding to them on Saturday.

I’d tell you “good luck,” but I don’t mean it. So instead, I’ll just say…may the best team win. No…let me rephrase that. May the team that scores the most points win.

I don’t need a game to tell me who the best team is.

See you in Foxborough!

Go Colts!!

XO

13 comments

  1. brent nowostawski says:

    Very nice Heather ! Its hard to stay classy when it involves Pats fans. They’re arrogance begs for us to lower ourselves to their level. I fell for it many times. I’ve seen it personally for many years when Boston College fans come to South Bend. Rude and obnoxious is all I can say. Pats fans still think its 2004 instead of 2014.There is no other qb I’d rather have than Andrew Luck. INDY has been truly blessed having Peyton and now Luck. On top of that , we have the best,most humble,loyal,classy,fun,passionate and intelligent fan base in the NFL. I’m so proud to be a COLTS fan and be part of the COLTS family with people like you Heather !

    • Mp says:

      Why don’t you guys pump the breaks on the high and mighty bs and do a little research on who Dan shaughnessy actually is? Not a pats fan first off. Is actually perhaps the biggest sports media troll in the entire country. All he’s trying to do is get a rise out of you to get his name out there so he can hype his next crappy book. Mission accomplished. Just google shaughnessy texans and you’ll find the same dumb article directed at last years texans team.

  2. Rick says:

    Congratulations, you completely bit the bait. Dan Shaughnessy is FAR from a fan of the Patriots. In fact, he often mocks them. He credits their success to the ineptitude of other coaches/teams and pure luck. He writes articles to troll people like you into writing a blog post in response to him. As the previous commenter said, do a quick Google and see that he wrote almost the EXACT same article last playoffs about the Texans. Guess what? It worked then too. In fact it worked SO well, Arian Foster posted it on his Twitter account. Guess what? More views, more publicity, more money. You gave him exactly what he wanted. Ho-hum.

    Rick

  3. suzy says:

    whoa whoa whoa… eeeeeeasssy everyone.
    this is actually fun!
    You hate to lose, and you like to hate the winners… we get it… yes, my name is Suzy and I am a PATS fan. i’m sorry your teams suck.. and we kick ass… that your teams are the equivalent of a “satisfactory but could do better” comment on a report card… its really not our fault that we achieve Deans list every single year…( and thats just FOOTBALL!)
    Fortune and Glory… Fortune and Glory!
    btw… many New Englanders tend to dislike the Boston Globe columnist, Dan Shaughnessy, too…
    Go Pats… and yes, we will kick the Colts ass Saturday.
    Love,
    Suzy

    • Michael says:

      Whoa there, Suzy. Your team has been very mediocre since they got caught spying on teams. Since that came out, your “Fortune and Glory” has been a playoff record of 7-7 with zero super bowl wins.

  4. Robnus says:

    Great article as I told you before! Love yours and all of #ColtsNation passion to stomp anyone’s butt who wants to speak crap. So, Dan may be a troll just like Skip Bayless, but the story was written by Dan, about OUR Colts. Mp and Rick, good try on even coming close to the Bluemare for making a statement. And Suzy, the pats went 10-0 in the playoffs in the beginning of an era… That era is coming to an end while ours is just beginning with Luck. As the good Colts fan I am, good luck tomorrow!

  5. brent nowostawski says:

    Suzy , Andrew Luck’s first 2 seasons in the NFL blow Brady’s first 2 seasons off the map. 6 different teams (2 of those 6 TWICE) have won SB’s since new england. You Pats fans love to live in the past. This is 2014 , not 2004 !! The pats had a chance to be the best of all time at 18-0 but choked! Brady had the opportunity to have home field throughout THIS year but threw an interception and couldn’t beat the Dolphins…CHOKE! The last time new england won a SB , You Tube or Twitter wasn’t even launched yet! In their last 7 play-off games the pats are 3-4 with 3 of those losses AT new england. You should be proud of the history of your team 10 years ago when they used to win SB’s. The Colts have won (and lost) a SB since new england has, the last time new england played the Colts in the play-offs the Colts won. The Colts are a 2 year expansion team. 2nd yr quarterback , 2nd yr coach and 2nd yr GM. They won their 1st play-off game last week. These Colts are 1-1 in the play-off going against what people say is the best head coach w/what is probably a HOF QB that have been together for 13 years !!!! pats are favored by 7 1/2 points !! If I was a pats fan , I’d be embarrassed if they didn’t win , they should !! But we’ll see………

  6. suzy says:

    dude, the cheating “thing” is so ridiculous to bring up…such a lame … lame “retort”… its like saying, in 12th grade, you initiated me … you put eggs and ketchup in my hair, and then took me to the car wash to clean if off.. and i was traumatized FOREVER. BALL UP… MOVE on! We all know belichick is one of the best (dressed) coaches ever, and Brady’s talent is one in a gazillion… and we also know that every team (sadly) cheats by doing the same thing … NOT an excuse.. I think its vile, actually… its like watching a baseball game and the pitchers have to cover their mouths with their gloves when they talk to the catcher because some nerd in the upstairs booth watching the game on the tv is a lip reader,and doesnt have enough confidence in his team to not NOT phone down to the clubhouse and spill the beans…
    I’m not a fan. not a fan of intentional walks either BUT I digress.
    what sucks is the pats- they got caught. so funny… people bring up cheating, and the patriots… but why is it… that you never hear the grossness of the BOUNTY and the New Orleans “Saints”… i guess a career ending swipe to the knee is sooo much “classier” right Tanya Harding?
    Just shows you my point .. people want to hate winners!
    and Michael you proved my point!
    move on.
    we win!
    7-7 in playoffs… PFFFFFT!! who cares/// we make it almost every SEASON to the playoffs…and to the divisional championship! and to the Superbowl!
    AT least we make it that far!
    HA!
    We’re not living in the past Andrew, we are in the playoffs. 2014. we had a BYE last week and have home field advantage tonight. What part of the past are you talkin’ bout, Willis?! I see the present.. and it looks GOOOOOOOOD.
    Now lets get down and reasonable… yup, Brady isnt as sharp as he used to be… and our defense has maintained more injuries than the kim kardashian has husbands…. and the UNFORTUNATE situation in the TE department…
    but PRESENTLY… 3rd in the league in points…with 27.8 which we DOUBLE tonight with our eyes closed! ( haaaa!!!)
    in the top ten in rush, passing, and yardage… and i do believe Brady will hold on to a record of postseason passing yards… but Manning is close behind… oh… talk about a PRESENT… the only PRAYER the Colts would have tonight is Peyton Manning wrapped up in a big red bow but aww, shucks… that aint gonna happen… because somebody’s team chose LUCK INSTEAD of one of the best to EVER play the game.
    Luck! Something that in more ways than one wont be on your side tonight!
    BTW– have you seen Manning’s stats?!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • brent nowostawski says:

      Suzy , Congrats on your teams big win over our Colts. You are very lucky to have not had many injuries as you compare them to Kim K’s 2 ex husbands. The Colts have had a ton of injuries , which don’t bode well for such a young team. You see next year our QB , our GM and our coach will be in their 3rd year. Yours will be in their 14th year,your HOF QB and coach. Im sure Boston would have been highly embarrassed if you would have lost. You should have 6 or 7 SB’s but you don’t. You could have had a 18-0 season that would have you the best ever….but,yeah choked it away. I was in INDY for one of the best SB’s ever! The Colts have won (and lost) a SB since NE has won one. Mr Irsay and Mr Grigson have both eyes open , and yes made the only decision possible by letting Peyton go and drafting Luck. This was year 2. In a couple years from now , and TEN years after that ,you will understand why this organization chose Andrew Luck. Please take note , as we will show you how to win with class , just like we have before. Although some of us will remember soo many people like you. Good Luck next week , you will need all you can get and then some. Good luck with your car wash antics and fascination with the Kardashians.

        • brent nowostawski says:

          LOL , I can’t imagine any Colts fans being mad , silly. Can you read ?? We are rebuilding. Freshman year , we were 11-5 and lost a play-off game. In our sophomore year with many pieces yet to come and tons of injuries (which we don’t use as excuses , but motivation)including our lone veteran superstar, we went 11-5 and this team won its first play-off game !! We are excited !! Theres no team with a brighter future than the INDIANAPOLIS COLTS !! We have the best owner and the best city in the NFL. There are 2 things boston has that INDY doesn’t…a sense of entitlement and arrogance. Thank God. I hold my head up proud. Congrats again on a brilliant coaching strategy and execution last Saturday night.

  7. JB says:

    Silly little website by a fan of a meaningless midwestern team. Andrew, like Peyton, took yet another playoff beating in Foxboro. Hope you enjoyed it, Blue Mare.

    • brent nowostawski says:

      Silly, little, meaningless ,typical response by a classless Bostonian AFTER a game. Thank you for helping to keep the Colts organization and fan base classy. Have a great day ! :-)

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